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\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\FATMAIL: THE RETURN OF TROUBLE MAIL JUL 08 ////////////////////////////
It's been a long time since the Kind Rat of club music scuttled down the stairs of The End and propped his leprechaun-like torso against the bar. Gone are the locks of yesteryear. Gone is the brown tooth. Gone is the dishevelled arch-hippy with his chops smeared in KFC-grease and tucking a permanent semi into the waistband of his shorts. Behold, Fat Fans, a New Dawn of Arnold is upon us. He's lean, mean, shaven, scrubbed, with balls like curling stones and a 6 month backlog of lecherous tendencies.
Dressed head to toe in puy lentils, adorned with crystal trinkets and gorging on a permanent diet of shredded mung beans and guava halves, Paul is 'new man' personified: a metrosexual polymath almost unrecognisable to those who knew him as the gibbering facsimile of a grown-up member of Fagin's street urchins.
Thanks to the NHS, Trouble's head-on encounter with serious illness was won by the underdog: those decades of pharmaceutical research in the name of fun finally paying off. Unleashed back into the community, Trouble will now travel the world spreading the message of healthy eating, peace, love and Ipswich Town football club like with all the religious fervour of David Curesh.
So lock up your daughters, slip on some hemp moccasins and flush your weapons-grade ketamine down the toilet: a new era of Fat! has begun.
Check out Paul's blog (http://www.myspace.com/paultroublearnold) to read more about one man's journey from breakbeat nirvana to hell… and back.
///////////////////CHEW THE FAT! @ THE END, FRIDAY 11TH JULY//////////////////////
It's been so long since Trouble has been anywhere near a nightclub that he no longer has the first clue about dance music. It's an immense surprise to him that breakbeat no longer exists, with certain DJs only agreeing to play if there was no breakbeat on the line up. To which Paul replied 'That's weird, Chew the Fat! has always played everything anyway... Fat! Is Fat! and will always be Fat!... the fattest party around'. It's good to see the radioactive drugs haven't numbed his enjoyment of mindless repetition, something essential if you're going to make it through seven hours of this second-rate bunch of chancers...
Chew The Fat! @ The End
Friday 11th July (tonight folks)
Evil Nine
Radioactive Man
Streetlife DJs
Kid Blue
Signal Drivers
In da lounge Eden Collective present
Kraak n Smaak
Ch!co
Cool Uncle & Broken Bones
DTISM
Collins303
Ryu
DJ Spunkmonkey & MC Felch
Priority Entry Advance Tickets: CLICK HERE
£12/£8 NUS; 11pm-6am
The End, 18 West Central Street, London, WC1A 1JJ
Info: 0207 924 1333 / http://www.thefatclub.com/
Dress code: Trainers OK
Capacity: 1,000
/////////WIN THE FAT!////////
Last chance to win a goody bag packed with Kraak N Smaak CDs, Streetlife DJs t-shirts & signed picture discs, Radioactive Man albums, Fat! Records CDs and more head to http://www.thefatclub.com/chewthefatcompetition
/////////WE LOVE... CHEW THE FAT!//////////////
While others may view a 7 month battle against Leukemia as a slight hindrance, there was no way Paul was going to let it stop his mission to peddle his wares to the far flung corners of the globe. Even on his hospital bed, the mental image of 200 sweaty Spaniards and an Easyjet flights' worth of 18-30 hooligans from Luton bouncing around a club in Ibiza kept him going.
Chew The Fat! continues its residency at We Love... Sundays @ Space this week with guest appearances from Kid Blue and Smiggy & Ficklegruber, showcasing the finest collection of bald spots this side of Zinedine Zidane's barber shop.
//////FULL LINE-UP FOR 13TH JULY AT SPACE//////
Steve Lawler // James Zabiela // Ame // Paul Woolford // Smokin Jo // Elio Riso // Digitalism // Layo&Bushwacka! // Busy P // DJ Mehdi // David Phillips // Tom Novy // Jason Bye // Rob Roar // Andy Baxter // El Salon // Alfredo // Ian Blevins // Jem Haynes // Kid Blue // Smiggy & Ficklegruber // Andy Carroll // Ben Korbel // Jon Howell
For more info on We Love.. : www.welove-music.com
Join the We Love... Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2375384504
//////////FATSTIVALS//////////
Continuing our mission across some of the wettest festivals the UK has to offer, Chew The Fat! are up next at Bloom Festival.
Chew The Fat! @ Bloom Festival
Seven Springs, Gloucestershire
Sunday 10th August
Riton
Meat Katie vs Elite Force
Paul 'Trouble' Arnold
Kid Blue
More tbc
http://bloomfestival.com
Fat! crowned a stellar line-up of cancellations and drop out from the likes of Dizzee Rascal and Chas and Dave and took the distinct honour of being the only people who turned up to play.
Understandably The Fat! Crew were pleased to get back from hosting an arena at Zoo8 festival in Kent on Sunday to find it had been dubbed 'possibly the worst festival ever' on the XFM website. Paul and the crew had this statement to make:
"Chew the Fat! held an arena on the Sunday of Zoo8 which was rocking all day. Thanks to all the fans who came to the Chew The Fat! tent and made it a wicked day! We wanted to point out that Chew the Fat! was in no way responsible for acts not showing. This was due to the organisers not having enough funds to meet their financial commitments.
Many thanks to Micky Slim, Evil 9, Hannah Holland, Kid Blue, Stanton Warriors, Merka, Baobinga and I.D. and Small Fry who all helped the Chew the Fat! Arena rock …
For those disappointed that they didn't see MSTRKRFT and Switch we are very sorry - it wasn't our fault, and we did out best with the circumstances, which were out of our hands … We think you'll agree the other DJs were just as good!"
As a consolation to those who were disappointed, we are offering a pair of free tickets for CTF! Tonight, just send your highlights of ZOO8 (if there were any!) to
This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it
/////////////////END THE FAT!/////////////////
The moral of the story is: it's good to be back, even if it is sipping Evian and with only one front tooth.
The Fat Crew x
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