12 Questions: Ordio Kid Interview & Mixtape | Chew The Fat! Parties

Ordio Kid – Cut + Paste Volume One (MediaFire)

Joining Marcus Nasty, Spyro, Chrome Kids and fellow Urban Nerds residents Rattus Rattus & Klose One in the second room at our 12th birthday party this Friday will be Ordio Kid. A member of the Ortofon Pro Team the boy’s got skills. He’s pretty funny too as we found out when we caught up with him and subjected him to our 12 birthday questions.

“A tin of spam, minus the opening key”

Read his answers and find the tracklist to his excellent ‘Cut + Paste’ mixtape after the jump.

CTF: If you had a talent, what would it be?

OK: The Pele Seven – Right Foot, Left Foot, Right Knee, Left Knee, Right Shoulder, Left Shoulder then Head. Its harder than it sounds!

CTF: If you were captured by gay pirates and had to choose any object to be inserted into your bottom to save your life, what would it be and why?

OK: A gold bar, because when I shit it out, I’d be rich!

CTF: Who is the biggest twunt in dance music?

OK: Mark Ronson – epitomy of a waffler.

CTF: Apart from your close relatives, do you think anyone will know who you are in three years time?

OK: I don’t even think my mum will want to know me in 3 years as I piss her off by borrowing money from her all the time! The cleaner at work will remember me because I make his day by calling him “boss” and I don’t work for him.

CTF: On a scale of 1 to braindead, how many braincells would you reckon you have left?

OK: Just enough to be able to string the words together for this interview!

CTF: If we were to weigh your balls, which reconstituted meat product would you estimate they weigh the equivalent of (e.g. mini-scotch egg, pork pie, jumbo sausage roll etc)?

OK: A tin of spam, minus the opening key.

CTF: On a scale of one to ‘cool’, how ‘cool’ do you think you look when you walk through a public space carrying a record bag? Do you look cool? Do you? Well do you?

OK: Relatively cool, I get my assistant to carry it for me. His name is James Benenson “founder” of Urban Nerds.

CTF: If you were a pizza topping, which would you be and why?

OK: An anchovy, its an acquired taste, just like me.

CTF: What is the point of a DJ?

OK: It gives girls another type of “famous” person to throw themselves at. Which in no way am I condemning. Keep up the good work ladies.

CTF: Where will you be in 12 years time?

OK: Still trying to work out how to plug in Serato properly.

CTF: Any final words of wisdom?

OK: Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

Ordio Kid – Cut + Paste Volume One

1. Sound of Kuduro : Buraka Som Sistema

2. 26 Basslines : Benga