Headlining our 12th birthday party this Friday October 9th, Hervé and Trevor Loveys unite under their Speaker Junk guise for a very special back to back set. We can’t wait! We asked Hervé our 12 fucked up birthday questions and besides threatening to cut off our hands with his shiny machete he kindly obliged. Read his words of wisdom and find out how you can win a copy of his new ‘Cheap Thrills Volume 1′ CD after the jump.

WIN A COPY OF ‘CHEAP THRILLS VOLUME 1′

We have two copies of Hervé’s fresher than fresh compilation (featuring some huge exclusives) to giveaway to Fat! Club readers. To enter just leave a comment below answering the following question:

‘Who is Hervé’s production partner in Speaker Junk?’

CTF: If you had a talent, what would it be?

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H: The ability to answer questionnaires in a humorous manner

CTF: Who is the biggest twunt in dance music? катина пизда и жопа

H: There’s a lot of really lovely people in dance music, I’ve made some amazing friends through it, but on the flip side there are some massive cunts. I won’t mention names cos you’ll know ‘em when u meet them! We just try and ignore them and focus on being zen.

CTF: Apart from your close relatives, do you think anyone will know who you are in three years time?

H: I fucking hope not!

CTF: On a scale of 1 to brain-dead, how many brain cells would you reckon you have left?

H: 1 to brain-dead? I don’t think you have a usable scale going on there.

CTF: If we were to weigh your balls, which reconstituted meat product would you estimate they weigh the equivalent of (e.g. mini-scotch egg, pork pie, jumbo sausage roll etc)?

H: If you were to (try and) weigh my balls i would probably cut off your hands with my shiny machete.

CTF: On a scale of one to ‘cool’, how ‘cool’ do you think you look when you walk through a public space carrying a record bag? Do you look cool? Do you? Well do you?

H: Records? I have had a USB stick surgically implanted into my index finger with all my tunes on it and the other index finger is an earpiece. I look kinda odd when I DJ.

CTF: When did you last weep for humanity and why?

H: I don’t know if I have. I cried when my dad died.

CTF: If you were a pizza topping, which would you be and why?

H: Parma ham, cos it’s goooooooooooood shit!

CTF: What is the point of a DJ?

H: I consider that every time I’m dragged from my studio to go and play. DJs are entertainers not artists (the DMC/scratch DJ is another subject to be discussed elsewhere without me around!!!), so I think that’s why people like myself and Trevor can sometimes be nervous/uncomfortable with the DJing thing as we’re artists first, DJs second.

CTF: Where will you be in 12 years time?

H: Hopefully in a hot country writing music surrounded by good friends and loved ones, with my own liver intact.

CTF: Any final words of wisdom?

H: Avoid loud and aggressive people. But don’t have no passion or opinion at all, people who think everything is great are as useful as someone with no opinion at all.